3 Ways to De-Stress Culture Stressors during the Holidays
Dec 15, 2024
Coaching HR leaders and small business owners this month revealed a couple of types of responses to the holiday/end-of-year crush:
- “This could not have come at a worse time!”
- “Things are slowing down a bit. We’re really enjoying . . .” and then they may name an exciting proposal they submitted or a new project opening up.
I wondered, “What makes the difference?”
They’re both facing the same time of year with its stress to produce, plan, and profit while navigating unusual schedules.
For one, it’s the most woeful. The stress suffocates.
For the other, it’s the most wonderful. The stressors seem irrelevant.
So I asked the second group about the difference. I discovered three ways to de-stress culture stressors during the holidays.
Want to make this holiday your most wonderful time of the year? Do these three actions today to de-stress your work culture:
Ask Great Questions
Rather than reacting to holiday stressors on a feeling level, the second group filters them and responds on an emotional level. That involves asking great questions of others and themselves. The questions begin from a strategic level, e.g., what are the goals, hopes, dreams, frustrations, and fears that accompany the stressor.
Then they drill down to specific ways to accomplish the goal with the least friction. This “Do One Thing” perspective pushes back on the stress reaction to the stressor and shapes a more emotionally mature response.
What great question will you ask yourself or a teammate today as a stressor presents?
Answer Follows Listen
I discovered from this second group that once you ask a great question, you listen.
It’s one thing to hear whether you’re talking to yourself or someone else. (You do talk to yourself, right? 😊)
“I hear you,” we say to a teammate.
It’s another to really listen.
“Oh, I understand,” you say when you listen actively.
No anticipation or presupposition. No waiting for them to take a breath so you can say what you think.
Active listening leads to accurate empathy. Accurate empathy de-stresses holiday stressors.
You let your teammate know you’re listening by using some of their words in your response, and yet more than their words; words that interpret what you heard.
“Answer” only precedes “listen” in the dictionary. “Listen” best precedes “answer” at work.
How will you listen first and then answer today as a teammate shares a learning experience or situational overwhelm?
Act Respectful
I discovered from this second group, that when you listen first and then answer, you see from a teammate’s perspective.
Now on the way to this new perspective, your internal conversation may sound something like, “Well if you’d just do this (and you name “the perfect solution”), the stress would be gone and you could perform with excellence.”
We all do it . . . until we insert “act respectful” into our self-management.
“Act respectful” removes the need to fix the situation
Like you, the teammate is doing the best they can with what they have going on at the time. Holidays pile on additional demands and often in uncomfortable or unfamiliar ways.
As Dr. Covey was fond of saying, “Seek first to understand.”
A problem-solving approach has the opposite effect, creating a culture of “ignorance at best and stupidity at worst” reaction to the teammate.
Act respectful based on what you heard when listening and discovered when asking.
Respond, “That’s why I’m here,” and “Please let me know how I help.”
How can you best show your teammates you respect them today?
Sure, the holidays are a busy season for everyone. Stressors greet you hourly.
What a wonderful opportunity for you to de-stress your work culture to grow people and profits as you: give positive customer experiences in a crowded, hurried-up marketplace.
- ask great questions
- listen and then answer, and;
- act respectful.
What’s your question about how to create a positive work culture? Ask Dr. Joey here.
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