What You Affirm, You Amplify
Most people leaders run their team on correction. They issue three corrections for every affirmation, then wonder why their people go quiet.
The research points the other way.
John Gottman found lasting marriages run about five to one, far more positive interactions than negative ones. High-performing teams lean the same direction. The exact number matters less than the direction.
What you affirm, you amplify.
That principle anchors the A in F.R.A.M.E. @ Work, the third lens: Affirm What's Working.
The Squirrels Who Beat the Engineers
My wife and I love to feed the birds on our farm. We feed squirrels, too. I bought a weight-sensitive feeder designed to shut the seed gate on anything heavier than a bird. Our farm squirrels defeated it in three days. One stands on the counterweight and holds the gate open. The other feeds. Then they switch.
Two squirrels, no manager, no incentive program, accomplishing what an engineering team designed a feeder to prevent.
Why? Each squirrel's contribution gets rewarded every single time.
Your team does the same arithmetic. They contribute as they get rewarded. They withhold as contributions get ignored.
Specific. Named. In the Moment.
Affirmation is a craft. Gallup's two decades of work culture data point to three qualities that separate affirmation that lands from affirmation that flops.
Specific.
Named.
In the moment.
"Great job, team" is none of these. "Roberto, the way you stayed forty minutes past your shift Thursday to help Lena close that order is exactly what makes our culture what it is" is all three.
Your team can tell the difference inside three seconds.
Maya's Friday Notebook
Maya, the people leader at the heart of F.R.A.M.E. @ Work, kept a small notebook. Every Friday she wrote three specific contributions she observed across her team that week. A person, a behavior, an impact.
Three sentences. Five minutes. Once a week.
Two months later her notebook was full, and her team's engagement began to climb. She ran no new program and spent no new budget. She affirmed what worked, and her team amplified it.
Lisa Cummings says it plainly: notice what works to get more of what works.
Your Affirm What's Working DOT Challenge
This week, catch three people doing something well.
Make it specific. Name the behavior.
Make it personal. Use the person's name.
Make it timely. Share it within a day.
Work Positive Bottom Line
What you fail to name, your team fails to value. What you affirm, your team amplifies. Once you affirm, protect the soil by learning to mow the mental broom straw.
The strengths have always been there. Your lens tunes to find them.
Do One Thing today.
This post is from Dr. Joey Faucette's new book, F.R.A.M.E. @ Work: Five Lenses That Transform How People Leaders Cultivate Their Team.
